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  • Writer's pictureKristen Rocco

Don’t Be That Wedding Guest

Wedding Guest

Just as the bouquet and garter belt toss have fallen by the wayside in recent years for brides and grooms, changes to etiquette for guests attending their weddings have also evolved.

I was driving to a wedding in North Carolina over Memorial Day weekend with my husband and another couple and we began talking about wedding guest dos and don’ts from our own wedding day experiences. I think every bride has gotten a phone call the day of her wedding to ask for directions or notify her of a last minute cancellation. While it may seem respectful from the guest’s perspective, it causes undo stress for the bride. In other words,


Text the bride or groom on their wedding day of about logistics

If you must cancel last minute, don’t call the bride or groom. It’ll just add to their nerves. Get in touch with a family member and let them know instead. Following the same suit, do not call or text them asking for directions to their wedding. They go out of their way to put directions on their wedding website or on the invitation. Before you leave your house, make sure you have what you need to go to the ceremony and reception on time. On the other hand, do show your enthusiasm for their wedding with celebratory Facebook posts or even a short text message with your congratulations on their wedding day.

Bring a gift to the wedding, especially a destination wedding

Ship it to the couple’s house before or after the wedding. The bride and groom will have so many things to collect and remember after the wedding is over, it’s helpful to ease their load by sending a gift directly to their home. If you select a gift off of their registry, shipping is extremely convenient since their address is already in the system.

Show up drunk

Sorry, friends. No heavy tailgating before the ceremony. Leave your drinking to the reception. This is just an issue of respect. Focus and attention should be on the couple getting married. Don’t make it about you.

Cause a scene

Same as above. Bringing your excitement to the wedding is more than appreciated, but there’s a line you shouldn’t cross. Manage your alcohol. No public fights. No illegal substances.

Just go to the reception

If you RSVP yes, you commit to the entire affair. This also means being on time for the ceremony. Don’t take attention away from the wedding ceremony by walking in 10 minutes late. Don’t be that guy or girl.

Let your random date be in all the pictures, especially with the bride and groom

Just being honest here that chances are that your random date won’t be in your life forever. However, you’ll be looking at those pictures for a long time. Take a few photos without your date to save you from future regret.

Cheers to being a dream wedding guest and having a great time!



*this article originally appeared in my Huffington Post column at


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